This is our second rough cut. After receiving feedback from our first rough cut we amended some of the things that were wrong in our music video. However, there are still some things which need to be changed and we need to film more footage to add to the narrative of the music video, to make it clearer.
Feedback
Teachers
Concept and narrative aren't clear - doesn't show an "excellence in shooting material"
Needs to include more location shots to emphasise where he is throughout the video
Needs to show a closer attention to Mise-en-scene
More continuity - needs to be either walking or laying
Include the concept of the recurring dream
We decided to get feedback from teachers separately as well as peers because then we would have more detailed feedback so our next rough cut could be as good as possible.
Students
I like the mixture between black & white and colour shots, although there could be even more black and white
The ending could do with improving as being hit by a car seems unrealistic
Some unwanted audio is still there - you can hear somebody say "do it slowly yeah"
It may be a bit far fetched but you could include another character to make the narrative clearer
The feedback from students, paired with our feedback from teachers has given us more detail to work on.
By Jack Jolly and George Martin
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